It was a hot summer night, with stifling, thick air and nothing but the sound of traffic below her.

If she closed her eyes, she could pretend that the cars were cicadas, like back in Alabama. The cicadas never stopped there. Back in Alabama, where there were long summer days and wide-open spaces that stretched on forever. Her home.

Sometimes, she would sit with her brother on the rough, mangled wood of their front porch, laughing and screaming at every card game that she lost. Her dad would rock gently in his chair, silent and calm, and her mom would hum a little tune as she washed the dishes, watching them through the kitchen window. It was what she thought of when she heard the word ‘home’.

But the city that sprawled out below her was a bright, busy contrast to her memories. Burning lights blinded her at every turn, buildings crawled up so high that even the sky was covered, and the stars were hidden by the smoke and the smog. Even on a clear night like this one, though, only one or two of the lights managed to sparkle enough to be seen.

That’s why she kept her eyes closed. Better to imagine a pretty lie than to look upon an ugly truth. Mary taught her that.

Mary was the one that brought her here. Her best friend, her love, her life – Mary was infallible. She never once doubted anything Mary told her. Maybe that’s why she had ended up like this, so close to the edge, so dangerously close.

Beautiful Mary. So sweet, so languid, so amazing. She had never seen anyone like her before. It was summer then, too, when they met. An old friend that had moved to the city brought Mary along for a visit, and from that moment she knew that it was love. She wanted to see Mary, she wanted to be with her. She couldn’t get enough, she had to see Mary all the time. She needed Mary.

So when she learned that Mary couldn’t visit that often, she decided she would just move to wherever Mary was. It didn’t matter the place, she would go. She would spend all her money and have nothing but the clothes on her back, but if Mary was there, it would be alright. Because nothing ever compared to the way Mary made her feel. Her presence was calming and peaceful. When she was with Mary, she felt like she could fly.

Others had been scared away over the years, but Mary never left. Mary didn’t care. Mary would always be by her side, when everything else had disappeared. In fact, she liked it better that way. She liked it when it was just her and Mary. There used to be a time when others would be around, but over time she decided that she didn’t want to share Mary with anyone. Beautiful, pale Mary. So sweet. So deliciously sweet.

And tonight, in the heat of the summer air, she would dance with Mary one last time. She held Mary gently in her hands, crooning, smiling, laughing. Mary was her one and only. Mary kept her going in life. And now, Mary would help her soar among the clouds, as her wings. Standing on the balcony edge, she held on to the roof above her and stared up at the sky. A star winked at her and she smiled back, thinking that it would be funny if she could go visit him. If Mary was with her, it was possible.

“Mary Jane,” she murmured. “Mary Jane, hold me… hold me…”

She jumped.